DIE MY LOVE

US, 2025, 119 minutes, Colour.

Jennifer Lawrence, Robert Pattinson, Sissy Spacek, Nick Nolte, LaKeith Stanfield, Kasmere Trice Stanfield.

Directed by Lynne Ramsay.

As the audience watches Grace in this disturbing drama, and thinking about the title, it would seem better as “Destruct, My Love” or, more accurately, “Self-destruct, My Love”.

This film offers a portrait of a woman breaking down, initially seeming in control of her life, arriving with her husband at their new home, her relationship with her husband, passionate, emotional. She is played by Jennifer Lawrence in a performance which becomes more and more intense as the film progresses. Her husband, Jackson, is played by Robert Pattinson, in love with Grace, their both rejoicing in her pregnancy, the birth of their child.

Then the film fills in some background about Jackson’s family, his father, ageing, touches of dementia, a cameo with Nick Nolte. His mother, Pam, offers a welcome performance by Sissy Spacek, ageing, living her memories, but disturbed, sleepwalking, but understanding and encouraging of Grace, caring, offering to mind the baby.

But, soon, erratic behaviour on Grace’s part, yet always devoted to the baby, carrying it, feeding it, constant care. We begin to see her mentally falling apart, isolated in the house away from neighbours, lonely with Jackson away for his work, craving his physical presence, but subject to mood swings, dreams and fantasies (especially for a neighbour who zooms past on his motorcycle and is later seen with his wife at a garage, the audience wondering whether he is real or exists in her imagination).

And Jackson brings home a dog who barks and barks and barks and whines – intolerable for the audience and intolerable for Grace. But, all the time the closeness between mother and child, even clutching the baby.

There are some flashbacks to Grace and Jackson courting, the wedding ceremony and even early indications of Grace’s erratic behaviour during the dance, leaving the wedding, strange behaviour back at the hotel…

Jennifer Lawrence has given some very strong performances over the years and is fully committed to portraying Grace, as a person, as a woman, as wife and mother, as lonely, experiencing post-partum depression, relationship with her husband becoming edgier, deteriorating. Jennifer Lawrence’s performance exposes Grace’s disturbed psyche, and at the end of it Grace is naked, laid bare, fulfilling the title, leaving the audience emotionally alarmed. A film for a female audience, a probing of the depression after birth. A film for a male audience understanding and empathy. And always disturbing.

1. The title and expectations? Something of a “Destruct, My Love, Self-destruct, My Love”?
2. The rural setting, the house and interiors, parents’ house, the countryside, flat open spaces, the roads? The town? The musical score?
3. The impact for the film for a female audience? Pregnancy, post-partum depression? The impact for the film for a male audience, understanding, empathy?
4. The introduction to Grace and Jackson, their age, the relationship, the house, looking it over, their passion for each other, manifestations? The pregnancy?
5. The flashbacks to their meeting, the proposal, the wedding, Grace at the wedding itself, the ceremony, the dance, her frenzy, going out, signs of what was to come? The wedding night, the hotel and her behaviour? The flashbacks in the light of the development of her pregnancy and after birth?
6. The background of the family, Harry, his age, memory, his death? Pam, the relationship with Harry, as Jackson’s mother, the gatherings, the other relations and their comments? Pam, concerned about Grace, her own sleepwalking, waking, dreams? Understanding Grace, visiting, the discussions, care of the baby? Audience response to Pam?
7. The focus on Jackson, in the forefront, in the background, in himself, in the light of his relationship to his mother and father, his work, away from home? Love for Grace, concerned? The birth, love for the baby? The issue of the baby’s name? His absences, returning home, Grace and her more erratic behaviour, trying to understand, his patience, impatience?
8. Grace, the complexity of her character, her mental health, when she married, the manifestations at the marriage and wedding night? Settling into the house? The birth and its effect? Her love of the baby, forever with it, carrying, tending, feeding it? Her plans for writing, the writer’s block, the visit to the party, the sympathetic comments, her reactions? Her wanting to be by herself? In the fields, crawling along the ground, her sexuality and masturbation? The distancing from Jackson? His exasperation? Her moods, behaviour, the hitting of the horse and the consequences? His bringing the dog, its continued barking, whining, on her nerves, eventually the confrontation, shootings, Jackson burying it? Driving, open the door of the car to get out?
9. The cumulative effect for the audience of this portrait of Grace and her experiences?
10. Her help from Pam? Having the rifle?
11. The neighbour, Karl, and his motorbike, passing, seeing him with his wife, the approach, the sexual encounter, reality or fantasy?
12. The final deterioration, naked, her past attitude towards her body, going into the forest, Jackson following, the flames (and the flames and forest fire at the beginning of the film)?
13. The impact of seeing a person mentally and physically deteriorating – understanding, sympathy?